I think most Holiday horror movies are pretty awesome. I mean we got killer snowmen, killer santas, and killer...well you get the idea. Yet no one has YET tackled the scariest holiday day ever.
BLACK FRIDAY.
That's right folks. No one to my knowledge has tackled this day. And why not? Come on, have you SEEN some of the people out there on Black Friday?! I went once in my life...ONCE... and never again. The pushing, the screaming, the trampling. OYE!
...it almost makes someone want to cut lose with a machete, don't it?
So I think there needs to be a Black Friday horror film. And it must involve the following:
- Disgruntled Retail employees.
- Midnight Madness.
- Tickle Me Elmo.
- Somewhere, somehow, a Walmart.
- A Muzak version of "The Little Drummer Boy".
- A Machete.
- Shoppers being trampled.
- A cleverly dressed killer..like completely decked out in shopping bags and livers or something.
- Fat lady in a stained Christmas Sweater.
I mean the kills practically write themselves, here. Okay Hollywood...you heard my case...get crackin'!!
These Holiday horror thoughts brought to you by crack!
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